What Would Fox Mulder do?

I guess everyone saw the Germany game. What a weird game that was. The picture was just gone for about 6 minutes or so, but it made the second half soooo weird and suddenly the game was over.

Now, I'm a sucker for Conspiracy Theories, but this time it was the miaudonna who became all paranoid first. She was totally convinced that something was majorly wrong and the game never unfolded like that suggesting it had been played before and was now very badly cut together. She got a bit crazy then claiming she was now a Medium (astro.com doesn't agree though... and well, she is scared of ghosts so this whole thing can't really work out) and travelled through time and it was all about her future ... yeah she kinda lost me there too, but it got me thinking...

What if actually during that time we lost, all the people where stunned in the stadium and the teams were sucked into space ... and then aliens impersonated them after those six minutes and not just them but also prominent figures like the Chancellor?

Now the official story is that the energy in Vienna was cut by lightning and the UEFA world signal was therefore lost. The pictures we later got (yeah I'm talking about that shitty wonky camera which was broadcasting in 4:3 instead of 16:9) was from swiss tv, coz they had an extra cable to the stadium (now that is common practice we know... remember those spitting incidents from Euro 2004 that were uncovered by extra cameras installed by certain TV stations and not UEFA?). And they claim that the sound and pic was a bit off coz the commentator was on the phone and well it all was a bit crazy...

yeah, well it sounds all quite believable, doesn't it?

But let's be honest, what would Fox Mulder have done? He'd gotten up and sprayed a neon coloured X on the floor to mark the point he lost time!!!

Where are those 6 minutes and what did really happen?

Now people who were in the stadium claim that everything went on normal during the blackout ... yeah, hehe, everyone whose watched MIB is aware how easy it is to "flashy-thing" someone and erase all their memories and replace them with something that never happened!

My take on what happened is that UEFA and Tom Cruise made a deal with the Aliens and at least the german team and their coaching staff were sucked into space and replaced with imposters. Tom Cruise gave a very convincing performance as Jogi in a TV interview after the game...

The cover-up story worked though, so we will never know if the imposters have been replaced by the real people yet or if they indeed will be lost in space forever!

And to all those doubters out there I'm saying: you have no idea ... the visitors from afar have been out there for a couple of weeks... lurking ... watching over the situation from the distance ... waiting for the opportune moment!

A Good Deed In The Name of Fizzy Happiness

I like fizzy drinks and in the past I've often been seen clutching a Coca Cola bottle like a baby while watching TV ... it's not consciously ... it's just to keep it close and so that I don't have to lean over to get it every now and then, coz I'm lazy... so I simply secure it by putting my arm around it. Nothing wrong with that!

When I walked down the street to my home earlier this week - with another one of my "passions" in my hand ... cheeseburgers - 2 girls approached me. I'd say they were maybe 11, but I'm horrible at guessing age. Anyway, they held a big bottle of some cheap Fanta substitute out to me and asked:

"Could you open this for us please? We can't get it open."

Now, I do remember the times when I was a kid and I regularly couldn't open fizzy drink bottles coz I wasn't strong enough and thus had been denied satisfying my sudden urge for sweet fizzy liquid until an adult could help out ... so of course I put down my new giant Primark handbag and my cheeseburgers and reached out for the bottle. And then it flashed through my mind

What if this a laborate plan to mug me and steal my beloved bag, money and burgers?

I looked at the girls ... first of all they were girls and then I thought

Don't be silly, you've seen these violent girl teen gangs on TV.

luckily the girls didn't look anything like the violent asbo-tastic chicks on TV... no, they looked nice and proper. And then secondly we were in Friedrichshain ... it's not exactly known for its criminal teenage girls.

But we are standing at a cross-road. They can run in any direction. And I'm slow.
Okay, calm down, you're paranoid.

So I tried to open the bottle, while they were looking at me eagerly ... and I was pacified, I knew the look ... they were waiting for their fizzy fix.

And then I could feel the pressure in the bottle building up ... it made a noise and they were like "OHHH"...

Ohh, NO! Maybe this has been their plan all along! They wanted to get someone random getting soaked in a sticky fizzy mess!

I didn't proceed with the opening and looked up at them

"Did you shake the bottle?"

They looked at me appalled ...

"No, we just couldn't open it. We weren't strong enough ..."

I could see they weren't lieing. And their "Ohhh" had simply been excitement about me being able to open the bottle. So I turned the cap further and the pressure actually disappeared. I opened the bottle fully , smiled and handed it back to them...

They took it, smiled and thanked me, turned around and happily walked down the street chatting away to one another looking like two innocent angels dressed in rose and pink.

I caught myself still smiling, picked up my bag and burgers and entered the corner bakery thinking how I had just done a good deed and helped out some girls who shared my love for fizzy drinks. Thinking about how paranoid I had been, I told myself, that in most other parts of Berlin, I would have been robbed and that I should be happy this didn't take place in Lily Allen's LDN!

It made me very happy about where I live ... and what made me happy too was that the kids had used an informal way of addressing me and didn't treat me like I was an old woman which had happened at Bristol airport when a mother told her child

"Sit down next to that woman"

That's so something that should only be said about someone who is past 35... to kids I should still be a girl.
So I was very happy about the fizzy drink angels.